From Guilt to Grace: Finding Time for Yourself After Baby
If you’ve ever stood in the kitchen, baby monitor in one hand and a cold cup of coffee in the other, wondering if you’ll ever get five minutes to yourself again… you’re not alone.
Every new mom hits that moment where she starts to crave a little “me time.” But almost as quickly as that thought appears, so does the guilt. “Shouldn’t I be soaking in every second?” “Other moms seem to do it all without needing a break.” “Am I being selfish?”
Let’s pause right there. Because here’s the truth: taking time for yourself isn’t selfish. It’s essential. And learning to release the guilt around that is one of the most healing, empowering things you can do for your postpartum mental health.
In this episode, we talk about:
Why self-care is essential for your well-being as a new mom.
How to carve out "me time" without compromising your responsibilities.
The importance of overcoming mom guilt to prioritize your needs.
… and a whole lot more!
Why “Me Time” Feels So Hard After Baby
Motherhood is full of love, yes—but it’s also full of constant demands. You’re meeting your baby’s needs around the clock, managing your recovery, your home, your relationships, and maybe even work. The mental load alone is enough to make anyone feel tapped out.
But what many moms don’t expect is how guilty they’ll feel for needing time away. Society tends to glorify the “selfless” mom who sacrifices everything for her family. Yet that version of motherhood is neither realistic nor sustainable.
The guilt comes from the false belief that good moms always put themselves last. But in reality? Good moms model balance, boundaries, and emotional health. Your well-being sets the tone for your entire household.
How to Redefine “Self-Care”
Self-care isn’t just bubble baths and spa days (though, honestly, sign me up). It’s about creating moments that help you recharge emotionally, mentally, and physically—so you can show up as the mom, partner, and woman you want to be.
Try thinking of self-care as “soul maintenance.” Sometimes that looks like journaling during nap time, walking outside with your baby, or calling a friend who makes you laugh. Other times, it’s setting your phone down and taking a few deep breaths before diving into the next task.
The key is to make it simple and sustainable.
3 Steps to Let Go of the Guilt
1. Reframe Your Thoughts.
When guilt shows up, notice it without judgment. Then, replace the thought “I’m being selfish” with “I’m recharging so I can give from a full cup.” Your needs matter, too.
2. Communicate Your Needs.
Talk openly with your partner or support system about what you need. Be specific—maybe it’s an hour to yourself on Saturday mornings or help with bedtime once a week. You’re not asking for a luxury; you’re protecting your mental health.
3. Start Small.
You don’t need a whole weekend away (though that sounds dreamy). Start with ten minutes of something that’s just for you. Over time, those small moments will build into a rhythm that feels restorative instead of indulgent.
A Gentle Reminder
You don’t have to earn rest. You don’t have to justify taking care of yourself.
You are still a wonderful, devoted mom and a human being with needs of your own.
Motherhood will always stretch you—but it shouldn’t erase you.
Actionable Takeaways
✨ Plan one small act of self-care daily—even if it’s just drinking your coffee while it’s still hot.
✨ Write down what fills your cup. Keep a short list of activities that help you feel like you again.
✨ Schedule it. If it’s on your calendar, you’re more likely to follow through (and less likely to talk yourself out of it).
✨ Drop the guilt. When that voice creeps in, remind yourself: a rested mom is a better mom.
Ready for more tools to support your journey?
Download my free Postpartum Mental Health Toolkit: A Resource Guide for New Moms. It’s filled with simple, practical ways to care for your mind and heart in motherhood.
If you’ve ever stood in the kitchen, baby monitor in one hand and a cold cup of coffee in the other, wondering if you’ll ever get five minutes to yourself again… you’re not alone.
Every new mom hits that moment where she starts to crave a little “me time.” But almost as quickly as that thought appears, so does the guilt. “Shouldn’t I be soaking in every second?” “Other moms seem to do it all without needing a break.” “Am I being selfish?”
Let’s pause right there. Because here’s the truth: taking time for yourself isn’t selfish. It’s essential. And learning to release the guilt around that is one of the most healing, empowering things you can do for your postpartum mental health.